In the journey of life, the choices we make in our formative years can set the stage for our future. Jake and Alex, two young men with similar upbringings and aspirations, took on different paths during their twenties. Let’s see how their values ended up shaping their future.
Jake’s Journey
First, let’s take a look at Jake. He had the average college experience, spending $146,000 over four years of school—the average as of 2024. He earned a business degree, gaining theoretical knowledge from professors who never ran a business.
But that’s not all he got for his $146,000.
Jake embraced college life to its fullest. He went out two to three times a week, drinking enough to forget his insecurities and gain the courage to talk to women. Despite the partying, Jake graduated with a 4.0 in business administration. He learned to juggle shallow relationships, recover from three-day benders in under 48 hours, and even utilized ChatGPT for college essays—arguably his most practical skill.
Eager to enjoy his newfound freedom, Jake landed a job that paid just enough to cover his expenses and slowly chip away at his debt, while interest on his college loans continued to build up. He dreaded going to work, where his arrogant boss treated him like gum on the bottom of his shoe. His days were spent staring at his computer, doing meaningless work that failed to engage or inspire him.
Jake had always harbored aspirations of starting his own business. He dreamed of being an entrepreneur, someone who could make a real impact. But with the crushing weight of his debt and a job he hated, those dreams seemed increasingly out of reach. The theoretical knowledge he had gained in college did little to prepare him for the real world, leaving him feeling lost and unprepared.
As the years passed, Jake’s lack of purpose began to take its toll. He started to lose passion and respect for himself. This change didn’t go unnoticed by Sarah, the woman he had met in college and had been dating ever since. Sarah, who was once enamored by Jake’s carefree spirit, began to lose respect for him. She started to test him, pushing his boundaries and challenging his decisions. But Jake, lacking purpose and confidence, failed these tests repeatedly. He couldn’t stand up for himself or take decisive action to improve his situation.
Their relationship started to deteriorate. The once lively and passionate connection was now filled with tension and resentment. The final blow came when Sarah cheated on him. Devastated, Jake confronted her, but instead of leaving, he begged her to stay. He felt he had no other options, no other prospects. His self-worth was at an all-time low.
Staying with Sarah only worsened Jake’s condition. He began to use food as his outlet and stopped taking care of himself. His weight ballooned, and his health deteriorated. Their sex life became nonexistent, further straining their relationship. Jake’s lack of motivation and energy made it impossible for him to pursue any of his long-term goals.
Months turned into years, and Jake continued to drift aimlessly. The debt remained, the job stayed unfulfilling, and his dreams seemed more distant than ever. He was stuck in a cycle of self-pity and despair, unable to break free. The vibrant, ambitious young man who once had the world at his feet was now lost in a sea of mediocrity and regret.
Alex’s Journey
Now let’s take a look at Alex.
Alex had a near-identical upbringing as Jake. He also had the same expectations of college as Jake.
Alex attended college for one year. He quickly realized that it wasn’t worth the money and wasn’t a conducive environment for growth. The fleeting pleasures of college life left him feeling unfulfilled.
Alex had aspirations of starting a business, so he decided to drop out and use his newfound time to improve his life by learning practical skills, joining communities, and building capital. He found pleasure in self-improvement and dedicated himself to learning and growing.
A year later, Alex had an opportunity to start a business. He didn’t know much about the industry, but he utilized his ability to learn from some of the greatest business mentors in the world through YouTube (free) and books (>$250). He embraced trial and error, learning valuable lessons along the way. Not only did he make money from his business, but he also acquired the skill set to start any business he wanted.
Without the burden of debt and still young, Alex decided to travel the world to find his purpose while experiencing all the world had to offer. During his travels, he met the woman of his dreams who shared similar aspirations. Alex’s confidence and discipline made her feel fulfilled and comfortable in the relationship, allowing Alex to fully focus on his purpose.
Eventually, Alex and his partner settled in their chosen location. They had children without financial worries, and Alex found immense fulfillment in raising them to follow in his footsteps. He instilled in them the values of purpose, discipline, and continuous learning.
What Can You Learn from This?
Alex and Jake were dealt the same exact cards in life. The main difference that caused Jake to end up miserable, unsuccessful, and purposeless, and Alex fulfilled and purposeful, was their priorities in their 20s. Alex understood that those years were very formative and held a lot of potential, so he decided to dedicate them to growth, learning, and delayed gratification. This gave him the financial, relational, and psychological freedom to spend the rest of his life doing what he wanted.
Jake, on the other hand, spent his 20s doing what the average 20-year-old does, following the culture. This led him to become an average American statistic.
2/3rds of the American workforce is “not engaged” with their work
According to Gallup’s research,
Only about 34% of American workers are “actively engaged” in their jobs. These engaged employees are enthusiastic about their work and workplace, driving performance and innovation.
Around 53% of workers are “not engaged.” These employees are essentially checked out, putting in time but not energy or passion into their work.
The remaining 13% are “actively disengaged.” These workers are unhappy at work, unproductive, and potentially spreading negativity to their colleagues.
73% of American adults are overweight
According to the National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey (NHANES), 73.6% of adults in the United States were overweight. This includes 42.4% of adults who were obese and 9.2% who were severely obese
Your 20s are your time to either make it or break it. Delayed gratification in your 20s can lead to a lifetime of fulfillment and success, while instant gratification can result in a lifetime of misery and mediocrity. Investing in self-growth during your 20s isn’t a sacrifice; it’s an investment with huge returns. Truly “living” in your 20s means pushing yourself to become the best you can be, which inevitably brings enriching experiences.
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